Augusto Montenegro 5

Here's Isaac's email to me (I was worried about him this past week so I mentioned some of my specific concerns, to put this in context):
Sounds like William had an awesome birthday. Thanks for the advice mom. I thought the guy tricking me was kind of funny because they all thought I actually knew he was Brazilian so that was funny. Most of my problems haven't necessarily been language; just my companion has only a little bit of time left before he goes home and isn't the most hardworking. So I feel like lots of our time is wasted sitting around doing nothing and we could be knocking on doors and actually teaching people rather than walking from one member to another and sitting and talking for an hour and then maybe knocking on two doors a day.  I really enjoy divisions [when they switch up companions for the day] because I get to actually work hard with others. I am with him again this transfer [next 6 weeks], but last Sunday after his nap he said I am in charge this transfer as senior companion. I was like, "I don't know Portuguese slash what to do because you never taught me and also you are called to be my senior companion." He was like, "you will learn better if you do it." So I am going to actually make him work hard and hopefully that changes something.

Hey guys,

This week not much has happened.  There was one day during divisions where it rained super hard all day so we came back to our apartment completely soaked so that was fun. It also marks the first time I got cold in Brazil.  

Side note I got your PACKAGE!!!! It was amazing! I love the Mermen calendar and I expect another issue next year. It is probably one of the greatest presents I have ever received.* 

Also a funny thing, me and the other American legit convinced the Brazilians that American girls don't poop because that's not high status, and they actually believe that now so that was funny.  

Two big things happened. I got another crazy bloody nose and my companion used it as an excuse to go to the hospital which is not what I imagined a hospital would be like. It was basically a small dirty building full of people in a line and we had to wait in line to check in and then wait our turn. We ended up waiting for 4 hours and then it was time to go home so we just left.  However it was really kind of sad because there was lots of people who like you could tell really needed help. Like little babies screaming and crying and people unconscious on a wheel bed and they just were waiting for the chance to see a doctor so that was sad.  

This next thing was a bit crazy and graphic so you don't have to read it if you want. [He's not kidding. I debated leaving it out, but it's part of his experience so I left it in, but if you have a dog you love it could be too much. William had to make sure he knew where his dog was before he could continue with his day. STOP HERE-->] but I witnessed a motor cycle run over a wild dog, and it didn't kill the dog so the dog was like rolling around screaming and I was like so sad for it and wanted to help it but didn't know how and then a man walked up with a machete and cut off its head and I was wow that was intense and crazy. 

[START HERE if you skipped the graphic story-->] I think Brian asked what they teach when first meeting people and this is an answer to that question]. We usually get to teach the first lesson about prophets and Joseph Smith. People usually will let us in because they want to hear a gospel message. The problem is nobody really likes to follow up. They just like to hear the message and say, "thank you," but thy never want to commit or actually read or pray about anything being true so that is difficult. However, there are some people who we are working with that seem to want to actually learn more about the church so I will update you on them. 

Glad William had a good Birthday!!

 

*His Christmas present- still missing another package and some letters, but part of our prayers were answered ;-) I asked his mission president to verify the address I had to make sure I wasn't using the wrong address and he told me there was a postal worker strike so that could have been part of the hold up). We made him a photo calendar with pictures of the family and his friends and the occasional random month with pictures from our vacation up north of him and his brothers pretending to be mermen...not sure how we'll get a second issue...unless everyone reading this wants to donate a picture of yourself as a merman (or mermaid)(clothed)...that would be pretty great actually. Send me your pictures! You have until October.  Here's a picture of the 2018 cover:

 

 

Augusto Montenegro 4

The third week diarrhea was expected, the fourth week constipation was a surprise and the fifth week return of diarrhea was never welcome.  Lets just say this week has been quite the experience and Gifford's 5 mile tempo runs trained me for the races and also this moment.  The self control over my bowels I have gained this week has been drastic.  After three days of destruction we had to call the mission president's wife and she put me on a lactose free diet so I am basically living like Eryn now.  I already miss cheese. 
On a happier note I feel like I am being spoiled because the mission president approved us to watch Cars 3.  It was in Portuguese but I still understood some things and watching something that normal was insane. I don't think I have ever been so connected to characters in a cartoon especially characters that are automobiles.  At one point one of the sisters was crying and I was like dang I don't know how I am going to watch movies in 2 years with out feeling an overflow of emotion.  However I did like the movie it was high quality. 
This week nothing really big happened just the usual walk and work all day.  However I think I did try the fruit paste Ben mentioned; that was pretty good, I liked it.  At one point I was asked to share some thoughts in English so I tried to, but I found myself struggling and stumbled through it just barely so I guess now I just don't speak any language.  Luckily I still can write pretty well in English.  Also this week I got a picture with a turtle and with a giant beetle that landed on my sleeve, but both were taken with the phone camera which I wasn't informed until after that it can't hook up to the computer so I guess you will just have to trust me. 
Also questionable music was brought out that was right on the border of approved and not approved that's why they [other missionaries?] had never played it before.  However this might be like a normal thing that everyone else is aware of but I had a blast listening to James the Mormon (a hype Mormon rapper) and some Mormon punk rock where they sang hymns in rock form and I thought of Gideon doing the same thing. 
I forgot to put this last Monday, but also we went to the mall which was a little bit sad because everything was normal and it reminded me of home, but we played laser tag. Not sure if that was supposed to be allowed but everyone was like, "do you have 10 reals?" and I don't really know Portuguese, but I was like "yeah" so we payed this person and then we played laser tag in like this giant inflatable bouncy house thing and let's just say Brazil laser tag is a bit different because they don't have that no running and jumping rule so it was basically the most hype game of laser tag I ever played.  I did lose though so that was too bad. 
I love you guys so much. have a good week. I am sad the vikings lost that would have been fun to have them in the Superbowl.

Augusto Montenegro 3

So this week not too much happened but it was really fun.  I had splits with the one Elder that said he was American but forgot English and apparently I was just dumb and he is Brazilian but speaks some English.  However we had fun, we pretty much clapped at doors the whole day, but at the end the bishop came with us to visit people. I thought it was for one person, but after that person he was like, "lets go visit Janis and Nilsi too" and I was like, "they live on the other side of the area, that's like a 45 min walk." He was like, "we keep the word of wisdom, we will walk and not faint." Then we like booked it and turned it into a 20 min. walk. Apparently he really had to use the bathroom too so we were really booking it. However once we got there they weren't even home and the bishop was like I still need to pee so he just straight up peed on the side of the road. Then the other Elder with me was like, "Does your bishop in Minnesota do this?" I was like, "No, I don't think he does,"  but now I have the image of Bishop Miller peeing on the side of a road in my head and it's pretty funny. 
On a side note everyone here doesn't understand my sarcasm because my language is bad so that's a bad habit that I need to get rid of because people keep taking my sarcastic comments seriously.   
This Saturday we had a baptism planned for Fabio, but when the time came he never showed up, which surprised me because he seemed super excited about it. When we visited him the next day, apparently his dad wouldn't let him get baptized because his dad hates religion so we told him to bear his testimony to his dad and tell him why he wanted to be baptized so hopefully that goes well.  This whole thing surprised me because Fabio is 24 and I was kind of like, "Your dad doesn't let you make your own choices?" But I didn't actually say that.  We also had our first Zone conference which was fun because there were other Americans so I spoke lots of English, which was probably bad for me, but it was really nice to speak English again.  It was fun, we ate lots of food and I saw my companions from the CTM again.  We watched a video about President Monson but it was in Portuguese so I didn't understand anything.  Also one house we went to they were watching a movie and it was in the other room, but I knew it was Doctor Strange from the soundtrack so I was pretty proud of myself for that one.  Love you guys, keep having fun, and stay safe.

Augusto Montenegro 2

Isaac seemed a little rushed today. Here's his letters to me:
[roughly 7am central time letter]
Awesome week I am proud of you [response to what I wrote him] I will try to write a big letter to you too but it is Eryns birthday so I will write her first Love you too though
[9hrs later letter]
Sounds awesome sorry I am getting back late.  My companion is not too great at communicating things.  Anyways, this week has been a long hard one. Not too much happened.  I had my first division and my companion was sick so I worked with other Elders this week so I didn't accomplish much. [I think he's saying since his companion was sick he went out with other missionaries.] However, there was one lady we taught that had a past in drugs and people wanted to kill her.  That's all I picked up.  Also we met a clock builder repair dude and it's just like you would imagine! He was this old short guy with crazy white hair and just sat there working on clocks and talked to us. I felt like my whole life was being foreshadowed and prophesied because he was speaking in riddles in this small room covered with clocks and watches, and for some reason buttons.
I have a massive blister that the Brazilians were excited to pop. They used a needle, but I was surprised because they put some thread on it still and pulled it all the way through. It was so all the pus could drip down the string, and I was like, "smart." I have some pictures I will attach.
Also, we ate at Burger King which is actually high quality here. I also found a sweet deal, 36 burger patties for 9 reals, which is the equivalent of 3 dollars, so I have been cooking myself a double cheese burger for dinner every night. 
I love you guys so much keep kicking!  Also still barely can communicate in Portuguese
[a few minutes after that]
Some deep stuff went down maybe I will tell you when I have more time next week.  Not bad stuff all good don't be worried but deep stuff.  Love you !! have fun at the pasta party.
[letter to his dad]
Language barrier is a barrier for sure, but I find myself remembering stories in Portuguese so maybe that is a good sign; and I started dreaming in Portuguese.  But I still can't communicate well.  I had one person ask if I was Brazilian or American after I said, "tudo bem." I responded, "brasilero." Then they said, "ahhh American." So I hope that means I am getting somewhere if I can make it through the first word.  Love you too happy three kings day!!

Augusto Montenegro 1

It was wonderful to talk with Isaac on Christmas! He seemed to be as happy as ever and having a great time. He excitedly shared a few stories, one being how impressed he is with the kite flying skills of the kids. "They are master kite flyers here!" "You think there's no wind, but then a kid just lifts up a kite and up it goes!" "And they never get any caught in trees or power lines, it's amazing". He also went to a house that "had legit 10 parrots living in it and I got to hold 3".  His prep day is Mondays so he'll be writing on Mondays now. Here is yesterday's letter:

Hey guys this week has been crazy.  It started off with at night this giant moth flew into our house and I thought it was a bird but when it landed it was a moth and everybody ran around screaming. I got a picture of the moth though so I will include that.  Also not just the moths are huge they have massive frogs as well that are like bigger than both of my fists combined. I don't have a picture of that though.

                                    

Second, at one point when I was studying the language Elder Pereira went to the bathroom. Then after like ten minutes I heard him trying to open the door, but he just never came out. I was confused, but then he called for me to help him . Apparently the lock was stuck and he had locked himself inside the bathroom so he started saying stuff to me in Portuguese I didn't understand and I was really confused; but then since the door is like half rotten at the bottom he kicked out the bottom of the door and made me pass him his cell phone and he called someone (not sure who) and then yelled at me to destroy the door. So I yelled "Policia abrir sua porta!!!" and kicked the door down and he was hiding in the shower. We spent the next hour cleaning up the floor so that was fun. I have a picture of the half broken door.  

 

Also one day for lunch we ate at this person's house that was low key a tree house, but not in a tree, just like built on stilts for some reason and was super high up so that was cool.  Also I think this is a place Nasty J and Collin Clark would like because everybody just chills out shirtless in basketball shorts and bare foot, and just walks around and chills so I thought of them.  Also when you get coxinha you can get a drink with it called gioba and it basically tastes like grapefruit juice so I thought William would like it.  Also at the store I saw they have kinder eggs here so I will have to smuggle some home when I return in two years.  Also one of the guys at the CTM [Missionary Training Center] said I remind him exactly of the crazy mascot guy in Big Hero 6, and I was like "true that basically is me, except for his whole theory on how to wear underwear, that is not me."  

We had a baptism this week for Luiz. Saturday we were setting everything up when suddenly the water just didn't work to fill up the font and none of the water in the church worked either. So we were like, "what the heck?" and called the bishop who got there and basically knew exactly what was wrong. He like ran to the back of the building and opened up this hatch to a hole in the ground that had a like plastic pipe that had come undone and he legit was just like, "hold my feet" and went headfirst in. So he was like hanging down trying to fix this pipe when he yells at his kid to go get some yarn from his office, and he ends up fixing this pipe with yarn.  Which that lasted about 4 minutes when it busted again; so he tells his kid to drive home and grab his wrench even though his kid is like 11. Then we had to run to the nearest hardware store to buy parts. By the time we got back this hole was filling with water and the bishop was basically submerged as he fixed this pipe.  However he fixed it and we were ready for the baptism when it was like 5 min until and Luiz wasn't even there yet. So we ran outside and ran to where he works as a moto taxi driver, and were like, "hey man, what the heck?" and he was like, "oh, I thought it was tomorrow " and we were like, "nope its right now." So he drove home, and we ran back, and we ended up baptizing him, but we weren't back to our house by 9 so we broke a rule. 

 

New Year's here was crazy! Fireworks started at 6 and then they legit went until 6 this morning and it was hard to sleep, but I mean, I still ended up getting some sleep before midnight, so that's a first for me on New Year's Eve for awhile.

PS  One house we ate lunch at was blasting U2 and had concerts on DVD under their TV and I thought of home 

Here's some pictures Isaac sent of his companion and him, his apartment, another missionary, and Christmas dinner someone shared with him and his companion. (I think there are 4 missionaries sharing their apartment right now). (Oh, and Isaac mentioned in his Christmas call that they made what he didn't think were built with the intention to be bunk beds into bunk beds...I'm a little nervous about that...)